You – my readers – have a weird relationship with anthropomorphic anal toys: The more I review them, the thirstier you become for more info. So as soon as I published the review of the Dragon and XXXCalibur from Mr Hankey I got inundated with review requests for their other toys. This little piece is basically a shortlist of the most requested models:
Prince Charming: The heavily textured head with a large rim in combination with the knotty shaft promise fun somewhere between agony and ecstasy.
Solatok: Less a plug, more a dildo it seems ideal for fucking. The scales on the back will torment the prostate while the large knot will bust the sphincter.
Butt Bolt: This one looks like a real bruiser. A large tip promises an intense entry, the ridges on the side will stimulate/ tire out the sphincter intensely and the large different between the maximum diameter and the neck will be a good approximation of a fist punching a hole.
This list is
a great example of your great taste – or how well you know what makes the
hungry ass pig in me happy. So as much as these toys are on my Christmas list
for reviewing them for you, as much am I and my testee panel looking forward to
the testing process if I should get them one day.
As with all items in the little gift guide list Mr Hankey’s toys are premium quality, being hand crafted out of top notch platinum silicone which is reflected in the price. The Prince Charming and the Solatok are available at Mr S for prices between $129.95 and $184.95 depending on the size while at the moment the Butt Bolt is only available at Mr Hankey directly for between $69.95 and $144.95. But if they are as good as the ones which are currently traveling through Europe bringing joy to my testees, they are worth their money!
When I am a top, I am a bit of lazy top – except when it comes to spanking. But otherwise, I like to fetter a sub tightly and leave him a sub at a machine’s mercy, tormenting with painstaking precision and no escape. That’s why I love my Venus 2000 in combination with the E-Stim Systems 2b audio setting to create a vicious feedback loop. As much as I like the bi-polar plugs to “entertain” (some say torture) the sub’s rectum, I sometimes wish for a more… physical stimulation. There a fuck machine comes into play.
Not any fuck machine but the Shockspot 12’’. Unlike most other fuck machines which are propelled by an eccentric action motor the Shockspot uses a linear motor. The main difference is that a linear motor keeps the same speed and force over the entire stroke length so the is not lag in thrust once your selected a setting. Also, since the thrust of a rotation motor is limited by the diameter of the flywheel it rarely goes deeper than 20cm, 15cm being the standard for the inexpensive machines. That is ok for some people but if you want to get punch fisted by a plug or want to experience the knot of a large anthropomorphic dildo, it is simply too short! Because of that I would choose the 12’’ over the 8’’ Shockspot. Minor yet important advantages of a liner motor are the almost limitless adjustability of the thrust angle and that the machines are compact and stores away easily. Shockspot even offers a custom carrying case if you want to travel with your fucking machine (that is something I sometimes considered building for my Venus 2000…).
While the “naked” Shockspot is a good machine, the Plus package from Sexmachines.co.uk turns it into a good-ToyTorture-ready machine. The standard adaptor to attach toys to it is a vac-u-loc adaptor. This works for my Mr Hankey Toys but for none of my Bad Dragons or Squarepegs plugs (remember the punch fisting…) so I would need the universal dildo holder. The main control interface of the Shockspot is a PC where you can control the machine, select pre-written programs or write new ones. Especially in messier scenes involving loads of lube, a laptop in the playroom is a bit cumbersome. The Plus package also includes a physical control unit with rotary knobs to regulate all four variables influencing the thrust. So even lubey fingers should not be a problem. The Plus package also includes a Flashlight adapter but I guess for milking I stick to my Venus 2000 or my Doxy.
It has been three weeks since Tumblr announced that they would be banning NSFW content on their platform from December 17th on. Until this point the platform was one of the largest – if not the largest – collection of porn in human history. But the moment the news hit the scene, not only a ludicrous discussion about freedom of speech and censorship started[i] but people back-up their data and deleted their blogs. The exodus of active users, one star reviews in the app stores and steeply dropping numbers of blogs and app downloads apparently hit Tumblr so hard that they were forced to release a spurious statement that they would not be deleting but instead hiding stuff and that people can still leave their content on the platform – though nobody could see it anymore. Naturally this did not stop people from leaving Tumblr. At this moment a number of different websites are competing for the users looking where to display and consume their porn elsewhere, but no major one has emerged yet.
Being a big opponent of Facebook’s policies, I never used any of their services, including WhatsApp and Instragram. I have been on Twitter for ages, first with a vanilla account and when I started to set up ToyTorture.com with a kinky account. Tumblr followed some time later when I realized that Twitter was not the best place to present kinky pics.
opened up a whole new world of kink to me. The aesthetic inspired me for
pictures, the play setups gave me ideas which toys to get and the perversions
sparked interests in trying out new things. It also quickly became an important
social media channel for ToyTorture.com. Not only gave the large followership
and reblogs my reviews a big exposure but the message and chat feature over
time became the largest inbox for reader questions. Since this website is my
love child, a single-person operation into which flows a lot of my time, sweat,
tears and love, knowing that a lot of people read what I write and getting
feedback from my readers means a lot to me. Tumblr helped with that.
Last but not least, the affiliate links for Mr S, Regulation and E-Stim Systems I posted under the posts created a little flow of store credit. It was always my plan to make ToyTorture.com an ad free website to keep it independent. Despite all the critic I get for “promoting” certain products and manufacturers through Desiderates and Christmas gift tips, etc. it is still my personal taste and my wishes as a private person, pervert and toy collector which influences the toy selection and not some corporation urging me to post stuff in order to make money. Because of that, ToyTorture.com actually costs me some money for the server and despite a little stream of review samples a lot of money to buy the toys I review. The affiliate programs gave me store credit help me to buy stuff people are keen in reading a review about even when I am not that interested in the toy that I would spend my hard earned money on it. With Tumblr dying, I am certain my affiliate income will drop and thus limit the range of toys I will be able to review.
At the time
when this blog post will be published, my Tumblr account is still active. I am astonished
how many surprisingly sexual pictures are still visible to the public. But
still… Tumblr feels barren these days. For years, the Tumblr app on my tablet
was my go-to app when I was up WAY too early because of my insomnia. After the
purge it is still a collection of hot pics but a lot is missing. It does not
feel whole(some) anymore. Having “only” lost 25% of my followers and actually
gaining new ones every day (probably flocking to the blogs which still have a
decent amount of original pictures), it would probably still be worth to put
content on there. On the other hand, the entire controversy spoiled my mood to
post content there.
So I guess, I should delete my blog, taking a stand against SESTA and FOSTA and the frightening amount of sex-negativity and conservatism creeping into many societies these days by attacking Tumblr where it hurts them the most: Their ad revenue. To start the new year with a clean slate, I will be deleting ToyTorture.tumblr.com on January 1st 2019.
All the content I posted on Tumblr will probably surface somewhere else as soon as the dust has settled and a new major place-to-be for all the perverts will emerge. In the meantime, follow me on Twitter for content and the latest update where to find my smut. And if you are planning to buy something at Mr S Leather, Regulation or E-Stim System, take a detour over my website and click on one of the links in this article or the banners on the right sidebar. You comments, retweets and affiliate clicks keep ToyTorture.com alive. Thank you for your support and see you soon – where ever this will be.
[i] By definition, a private company
can not censor content or violate the freedom of speech. It is their right to
decide which content is allowed on their platform. The freedom of speech only
applies towards the government which must not forbid specific things to be said
A – humorous – saying in fisting is “Go big or go home.” While I should stress that fisting is not competitive sport and everybody should progress in their own pace to the desired stimulation, there are some perverts who need it bigger, harder, faster. For whom getting their sphincter stretched is an insatiable thirst. For those – and maybe to a certain degree me – is the Squarepegs Double Fist Plug. With its massive diameter of a bit over 10cm, it is one of the largest plugs on the market and I cannot imagine how heavy it is. But since it is only 25cm in overall length, it is probably “comfortable” to sit on – if you can deal with the feeling of a completely filled and stretched rectum. I am not sure if I will ever be able to fit conquer this plug but in Graphite it will definitely be a nice and intimidating decoration piece in my playroom –though for $249 a rather pricy one.
As some of you might know, I travel a bit for work. And if I travel for play, I usually take an entire suitcase of toys with me. So space and weight is always a factor when it comes to choose which toy to take with me. And sadly, sometimes due to that a toy has to stay at home.
Last year, I reviewed the Doxy Die Cast, the best wand massager I have come across yet. Yes, even better than the original Hitachi Magic Wand. In my playroom, it is put to very good use because it is the favorite toy of some of my regulars. Almost every guest, I use the Die Cast on, wants one afterwards. BUT: It is rather large and heavy, having a large external power adapter to drive the intense vibrations. Because of that, especially when I am flying or traveling to Berlin for a play weekend, the limited capacity of my ONE carry-on toy suitcase is simply too small. So every other trip I think “Wouldn’t it be nice to have a massager now?”
The Doxy Die Cast with the Neuxs Masturbator Sleeve Attached to it
In late 2017 Doxy introduced a smaller, lighter but still die cast case wand massager: The No 3. They seem to have hit a spot with a more portable yet powerful massager because ever since it has been in the “Top 5 Requested Reviews”.
Initially most gay kinkster who wrote to me were skeptical about the No 3 because the more nimble design meant a smaller head which could not accommodate attachments like a masturbator sleeve. As much as that was inconvenient, I did not really care because 40% of the time when I am using my Doxy, it is for massaging tight muscles (and I do not mean the penis!). And on the road for the other 60%, a small head stimulating the taint or the frenulum would have been enough for me.
The Nexus Prostate Massageer Attachment for the Doxy No 3
But this year Doxy teamed out with Nexus, most prominently know for their prostate toys, and made silicone attachments for the No 3. Unlike with the traditional massagers you do not pull them over the head but unscrew the massager’s head and put the attachment on. As a vigorous stroker a jerking-off sleeve which does not come off when moving up and down the shaft is a great innovation. Thinking about when using my Doxy Die Cast in the playroom on the dick and adding a No 3 with Nexus’ prostate massager attachments leave to evil fantasies. So there are many good reasons why I would want my stockings stuffed with the Doxy No 3 and both male Nexus attachments.[i]
The German Christmas tradition knows many rituals. One of the is Nikolaus Day on December 6th. On December 5th you place a well polished boot – or nowadays well cleaned sneaker – in front of your door, hoping that Sankt Nikolaus will come by at night and fill the footwear with candy and small toys when you have been good. But in the German folk lore he does not travel alone. He is accompanied by Knecht Ruprecht, a sinister and violent helper of Nikolaus who will leave a bushel of birch twigs in your shoe when you have been a naughty boy, warning you he will return to spank the naughtiness out of you.
The London Tanners Riding Crop
Looking at my Shox ID, apparently I have been a good boy. But this doesn’t stop me to put some toys on my wish list that would make Knecht Ruprecht’s duties easier. A couple of weeks ago I reviewed the London Tanners Mill Strap which I like a lot for being well made. Having a growing urge to spank a greedy, noisy bottom on a regular basis, I wondered what is missing in my collection – and my readers‘ and thus worth getting my hands on to review.
First, a traditional riding crop. Already in the iconic drawings of Tom of Finland, many BLUF men had a riding crop sticking in their boots’ shaft. After finally having gotten proper engineer boots as the last piece of a complete leather uniform, this accessory would both be hot and functional. I would choose the London Tanners’ riding crop over equestrian riding crops from sporting good stores because the quality probably higher but with a length of 67cm it is considerably longer than commercial ones which would just look absurdly small on me.
The London Tanners DD Strap
Second their DD Strap. I have many spanking implements. More than I can actually store easily accessible in my playroom. But despite the vast collection, I am actually lacking a basic piece: A leather paddle large enough to hit both cheeks. I have bullet-proof and aluminum paddles which do this job but not a leather one. The sound and feeling of high quality leather compressing warm, soft skin is simply something completely different and arousing! So the DD Strap is something that would make my dick hard and my spankees scream.
As much as I love the rich tobacco color of the Mill Strap, both toys being classics, I would want to add them in classic BDSM black to my collection. While the Riding Crop at 79€ and the DD Strap at 109€ are on the higher end of the impact toy price range, if their craftsman’s quality and material is like the Mill Strap, they are worth their money! They are something to bequest.
From 2012 to 2015 on each Advent Sunday I presented you some (unusual) kinky Christmas gifts. The last two years due to being too busy with work I let this tradition slip but this year I decided to pick it up again. I did some research – and found only the same quirky stuff I recommended the last years. Since one of the most often asked reader questions is “Is there anything a guy with your toy collection still wants?”, I decided to write down what would be on my kinky wish list.
Detail of the Arms Tied Down on the Sides
The first item on the list are the Mr S Vector Heavy Padded Bondage Sleeves. They are basically the arms of their amazing Vector Ultra-Padded Straitjacket with a harness instead of body. I know, for most bondage aficionados, stricter, tighter, more layered bondage is appealing but I am more a practical kind of guy with a bit of claustrophobia. So these sleeves are perfect for me. They appear to be as effective in immobilizing a sub as a straitjacket does. You can even tie the arms parallel to the body. But instead of enclosing the torso in a layer of leather, there are just harness straps leave all the important parts like the nipples, ass and junk fully exposed. A skilled flogging top might be able to hit the shoulder blades between the harness’ leather belts. Each roller buckle strap on the sleeves to runs through a D-ring, providing enough anchorage points to fetter the sub down tightly for example to keep him from moving too much when being exposed to wax play. Otherwise the hot wax might tarnish the leather.
Detail of the Harness and the Straps holdign the Bondage Sleeves in Place
Besides the play aspect, I like the aesthetic component of it. When being bound in a straitjacket, the entire torso is covered, hiding the leather uniform, rubber gear of body writing the sub is proudly displaying or forced to wear. This limited coverage is also great for outdoor play in the summer or street fairs like Dore Alley, Folsom (Europe) or pride marches when a straitjacket over gear might cause the sub to overheat.
Being made out of a lot of leather and needing a lot of manual work to create the beautiful vector-quilted padding, the Vector Heavy Padded Bondage Sleeves are on the more expensive side of gear purchases at $879.95 but I am certain I will get my money’s worth once I add this piece of bondage gear to my collection.
It’s here! It is finally here! The Oxballs Pig-Hole FF! When I launched ToyTorture.com almost exactly 6 years ago, I would have never dreamed that the most anticipated toy of the year would be an anal toy. I actually could not trace back when Oxballs first talked about a new, larger Pig-Hole on Twitter. The craze at my end started in January when Oxballs tweeted that the Pig-Hole was in the 3D printer and would hit the store some weeks later. Since this initial tweet I have gotten 350 (!) e-mails, Twitter DMs, Tumblr, Recon or PlanetRomeo messages asking when it would hit the stores and when I would review it. Over 150 people asked a second time and 4 (!) send me no less than 5 messages when they could finally stuff their butt with it. Never before had I such an interest in a toy. And here it finally is!
Size Comparison of the Oxballs Pig-Hole FF
I loved the original Pig-Hole XXL and enjoying getting double-fisted I am pretty sure that the Pig-Hole FF will not disappoint me. They made some design changes which just looking at pictures make sense to me; for example proportionally enlarging the base would have made the toy look cartoonish.
Like its smaller Brothers the Pig-Hole FF is Textured inside
Now, about a week since Oxballs launched the toy, I have already gotten more than three dozen messages asking me when I will share my two cents about this toy. I am not sure when I will the toy yet. But if anybody wants to give me a review sample, I’d like it in red to have it in a different color than my Pig-Hole XXL. For those of you who can’t wait for my verdict, you can buy the Pig-Hole FF at Mr S Leather for $124.95.
I do not only like to play with toys and ultimately review them, but I am also a bit of a toy collector, trying to accumulate iconic or original sex tools. In this category falls the SquarePeg Slink.
Square Peg was one of the – if not THE – first company which made depth toys out of platinum silicone which trough its smooth surface and right degree of flexibility is perfect for depth play. They started out with their a bit crude look Slither and over 10 years ago added the more technically Depth Probes. In 2011 they combined the two toys, added a dash of butt plug and the Slink emerged. Since then the Slink has become one of the most iconic and widely used anal toys for going deep. Because I got so many reader questions which toys for depth play to get, I reviewed the Slink and the Depth Probe this June. However, while I own the Depth Probe, the Slink was just a loan from my dear friend Teck Pup and now I want one of my own.
A few years ago, this was an easy decision: You just had to choose between SuperSoft Bronze and Graphite (though for “iconic” reasons you obviously choose the Bronze ;)). In 2015 SquarePeg introduced the Ripples versions of the Slink. A year later the Slink Spike. And two years later the Vortex arrived at the party. Which one should I get?
This question brings me to why I started ToyTorture.com 6 years ago: When facing the question which Slink to get, I searched the web for reviews of the different versions. How do the different textures feel? How do they impact how easy the toy goes deeper? Makes the textures’ added grip them easier to control? Sadly, there was nothing and with prices between $69 and $369 they are on the more expensive side of anal toys. So despite the price being absolutely fair for the quality, buying an unsatisfying toy will be extra annoying. For questions like this and to minimize the risk of buying a wrong toy, I started ToyTorture.com to give at least some orientation when looking for a toy for a specific fantasy, describing how they feel, perform and what can be done with them.
Apparently, today is my 7th Twitter anniversary. Thanks for listening to my trivialities for so long. To celebrate, these are the pics I used to promote the upcoming launch of ToyTorture.com way back then #ThrowbackWednesday
It's time! On Monday we're releasing our brand new horse - and while you wait, we're giving our followers the chance to win two copies of Jack for free. Just retweet this post and follow us to enter.
Good luck, and as always, see what we do at Weredog.co.uk! Retweeted by
PSA: being on PrEP does not require you to bareback. It is one of many safer sex methods and YOU chose which (combination) works best for you
Over the weekend I had several people asking me passive-aggressively if I do not trust my PrEP because I "still" insist on condoms
No! NO! Fucking NO! If you start your day with monopolar e-stim on the nipples, you should not be doing BDSM at all! This is way too dangerous and shows little respect for the safety of your sub! twitter.com/MasterAlexDOM/…
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